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发布时间:2020-11-26 关键词:雅思写作段落句子长短如何安排节奏!
摘要:雅思作文一般在250-300单词之间,句子数量大约15-20句。那么怎么来安排这些句子呢?很多同学也已经注意到,一篇作文中若全是短句,自然是不好的,但若都是长句,读起来的感觉也不会很舒服,因此雅思作文中的句子应该是长短句混合使用。
雅思作文一般在250-300单词之间,句子数量大约15-20句。那么怎么来安排这些句子呢?很多同学也已经注意到,一篇作文中若全是短句,自然是不好的,但若都是长句,读起来的感觉也不会很舒服,因此雅思作文中的句子应该是长短句混合使用。但是,问题是:什么时候该用短句,什么时候该用长句?新航道小编希望通过本文来解决这个问题。
我们先来看一个段落:
(1)Earlier scientists thought that during a man’s lifetime the power of his brain decreased. (2)But it is now thought that this is not so. (3)As long as the brain is given plenty of exercise it keeps its power. (4)It has been found that an old person who has always been mentally active has a quicker mind than a young person who has done only physical work. (5)It is now thought that the more work we give our brains, the more work they are able to do.
本段讨论的主题是:只要给大脑足够的锻炼,它就会保持活力。我们来仔细看看这段的句子安排情况。句(1)是短句,提出错误的观念,即以前的科学家认为随着人的年龄增加,大脑的功能会减退;句(2)是短句,对错误的观念进行否定;句(3)是短句,提出正确的观点;句(4)是长句,对正确的观点进行论证;句(5)是短句,换一种表达方式重申段落观点。5个句子错落有致,读起来观点明确,论证有力。
大家知道,英语中有短句,也有长句。短句结构简单,意义清楚,易产生生动活泼、干脆利落的表达效果;长句则用严谨的语法结构来表达事物间更为复杂的内在联系。因此,在表达段落重要观点的时候,我们通常用短句,而在对观点进行说理论证或举例论证的时候,我们通常用长句。用短句表达重要观点,很容易让读者抓住段落的重心所在,而用长句来论证,则使论证显得内容丰富,从而实现“观点明确,论证丰富”的表达效果。在上面引用的段落中,前三句旨在引出正确的观点,都用短句,句(4)是在论证,使用长句,句(5)再次表达观点,因此也用短句。
下面,我们来看雅思考官给出的高分作文的一个段落:
(1)There are, however, some disadvantages. (2)Primary school teachers are generalists, and may not have the necessary language skills themselves. (3)If specialists have to be brought in to deliver these sessions, the flexibility referred to above is diminished. (4) If primary language teaching is not standardised, secondary schools could be faced with a great variety of levels in different languages within their intake, resulting in a classroom experience which undoes the earlier gains. (5) There is no advantage if enthusiastic primary pupils become demotivated as soon as they change schools. (6) However, these issues can be addressed strategically within the policy adopted.
本段论证的是“从小学开始学外语的劣势”,一共6句,在段落中分别扮演四个功能,其中句(1)表达段落主题;句(2)指出小学外语教师的问题,即这些老师自己可能缺乏足够的语言技能;句(3)论证这个问题带来的后果之一,即需要从外面请老师来给小学生上外语课(句3);句(4)和(5)则论证另外一个后果,即小学外语教学若不均衡,中学生的语言技能就会有不同层次,从而让那些积极性很高的小学生进入中学后对语言学习不再有动力;句(6)说明这些问题可以得到解决。
那么,现在我们来看看这个段落中句子的长短如何对应其功能。句(1)表达段落主题,明显用了短句,这是整个段落中最为简短的句子;句(2)提出具体问题,其功能是引发下面的讨论,也用了比较短的句子,使其意义非常清楚;句(3)-(5)是论证这个问题产生的后果,句子长度明显变长;句(6)再次表达观点,回归到短句。这样,整个段落的句子长短安排就呈现如下节奏:
短句 -- 较短句 -- 较长句 -- 长句 -- 较长句 -- 短句
段落以短句开始,用较长句过渡到长句,然后又由较长句回归到短句。这个结构让我们想到讲故事的结构。会讲故事的人,也总是从事件的开端讲起,然后营造氛围,最终达到高潮,之后再慢慢让故事走向结尾。本段为什么读起来让大家觉得舒服?老雅认为,重要原因就是其句子长短安排暗合了我们听故事的心理节奏。大家如果再回头看看本文引用的个段落,会发现其结构与本段也很相似。
我们现在来总结一下。雅思作文标准段落一般由5句构成,其句子长短的分布如下:短句--较长句--长句---较长句--短句。当然,在实际写作中,我们应该根据具体情况,大致遵从这个结构就可以了,不必完全拘泥。下面我们先来看一篇学生习作的段落:
(1) The situation would be better if people really tried their best to save the creature. (2) Panda is a good example. (3) Panda is a typical endangered animal which only lives in China. (4) The number of Panda used to be less than 200. (5) Nevertheless, the lovely appearance of panda attract the world’s attention. (6) It is favoured by people all over the world. (7) Finally, though it is still endangered, the number of panda grows to 1000. (8) According to these, it is obvious that the situation can be changed.
这里的论点是:如果我们尽力挽救动物,动物灭绝的情形就会改变。怎么论证?该同学举了熊猫的例子。她的思路是这样的:熊猫是一种濒危动物,只有中国才有。熊猫以前的数量不足200。然而,熊猫的可爱模样吸引了世界的注意力。全世界的人都喜欢熊猫。最后,虽然还是濒危动物,但其数量增长到了1000。这就说明,情形显然是可以改变的。这个举例内容很合适,完全说明了观点,举例的语言大体也清楚,这样的作文可得6分,若要更上一层楼,则必须改进。该段共包含8个句子,但几乎所有句子都是短句,没有营造出合理安排长短句产生的节奏感。老雅这样改写:
(1) The situation would be better if people really tried their best to save the creature. (2) Panda is a good example. (3) As an endangered species found only in China, Pandas have grown in number from 200 a decade ago to 1000 today, thanks to the protection from people all over the world attracted by their lovely appearance. (4) This example shows obviously that the situation can be changed.
改写的版本中,句(1)是短句,表达段落主题;句(2)是短句,引出后面的长句;句(3)是长句,具体举例论证;句(4)是短句,重申段落观点。这样改写后,句子长度的安排就基本符合标准的雅思段落了。
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